How Learning to Be Positive Saved My Life

My life used to be centered around trying to be able to stay in bed as long as possible. It takes an incredible amount of effort to be unhappy. But at the time, I didn’t realize that. It was survival. I was fighting the world. Denial and anxiety were my best friends. Fear ruled my life. I had absolutely no hope for the future, as I didn’t want to live for the future. Why is there any point in living if it was just a constant battle to quiet the voices of fear and anxiety? I was fighting to survive, battling my depression every day, working with all my might to just stay under the protection of my king size down comforter for just a few minutes longer.

I had no idea it took so much effort to be continuously miserable. I was on auto pilot: fight or flight. Actually, I would have done much better if I simply picked fight or flight… but I picked hide, instead.

But then I had a friend introduce me to the teachings of the popular book and movie The Secret. It’s now so overused, and over publicized, but the message of the Law of Attraction completely transformed my life. I am completely responsible for my life, and I have control over my thought patterns. This concept had never occurred to me before. You mean, I didn’t just have to constantly keep reacting to life, negative emotions and anxiety?

The idea that whatever I put out into the world is what I was attracting back to me changed my life. I was staying in bed, trying my hardest to run away from uncomfortable feelings, negative emotions, and anxiety over the smallest things. All of my focus and energy was on avoiding the negative, so of course, that was all that I brought into my life. The negative. I was drowning in it. Once I realized that I had complete responsibility and control over my own thoughts, my life changed. Sure, life is never perfect, but once I changed my thought processes to positivity, I felt invincible. I could handle anything. And now, I still feel like I can handle anything.

It’s been a little over two years since I “woke up”. And stifling my inner negative critic is still a daily battle. The truth is… it takes effort to change thoughts that have worked your whole life to become automatic. Negativity is so ingrained in our society that the eternal optimist is usually frowned upon. “Thank God it’s Friday”, “This kind of thing always happens to me”, “Shit happens”. Our culture assumes that negativity is inevitable. But the amazing thing is, you can choose to be positive. Even if it feels forced, or you don’t entirely believe the statement, yet, the more you change your inner dialogue to being positive, the more you support that inner shift to see the world more positively.

Since discovering The Secret, mentors that teach positivity and personal responsibility have shown up. From A New Earth and Eckhart Tolle’s teachings, to Louise Hay’s philosophies and her incredible book You Can Heal Your Life, Dr. Wayne Dyer, and so many more of these revolutionary thinkers have begun to snowball into my life. Simply opening myself up to the thought that LIFE IS GOOD, instead of something negative that needed to be avoided, brought about a shift in my view of the world.

Easy ways you can become more positive:

Gratitude. Start a gratitude journal in order to focus on the positive. List five things per day in which you are grateful. Getting into this daily habit forces you to appreciate more out of your life, and subsequently conditions your thinking to be on the look out for the positive. You will begin to start looking for things that will go on your daily list, and expecting them to show up. Even if some days you can only think of the basics such as, enough food to eat, a comfortable bed, or the sun shining, no matter how bad a day is you can always be grateful. I remember when my mom told me a story about how her car broke down and she was stranded for three hours in the rain, waiting for AAA to pick her up. When she told my brother about her awful day, he (the eternal optimist) replied, “At least you have a car to break down!”

Affirmations. Begin repeating affirmations. Many of these still amuse me with their annoying level of optimism, or cheesy phrasing. But, they work. Telling yourself such extreme phrases of positive thought teaches your brain to reprogram your thinking to highlight the good in life. Louise Hay is the master of positive affirmations. Simply adding one or two to your wall or bathroom mirror can shift your thinking. Google “positive affirmations”, and there are tons of sites out there that give you a new, daily positive affirmation. Finding ones that go with aspects of your life that you are struggling with also help tremendously. I have found that they can ease anxiety, even if I don’t believe the affirmation 100%. You can’t think two thoughts at once. Only one thought can go through your head at a time (though it may be at lightening speed!)… so while you are saying a positive affirmation to yourself, the thoughts of negativity or anxiety are incapable of existing at the same time. That is the beauty of positive affirmations

Surround yourself with positive people. Keep the naysayers at a distance. We all have people in our lives that seem to always find something to complain about. It’s never their fault, and they always get the worst hand dealt to them. Whether they are family or friends, keep them at a distance. Once you begin to recognize negative thought, you instantly raise your awareness of how negative the people are around you. Your tolerance level for others being negative in your life instantly goes down as soon as your awareness of it goes up. You DESERVE to be happy, and it takes effort to surround yourself with others that are happy. Being happy takes effort, as does depression, but it is the most worthwhile endeavor.

Live in the present. So many people preach this recently… but what does it really mean?? It means don’t expect negativity. Don’t think about some future event and assume a negative outcome. Yesterday, my mom was talking about moving and said to me “If that garage isn’t cleaned out and organized before the move, I will have major stress!!”. Don’t assume that a situation will cause anxiety or stress, otherwise you will absolutely make it a self fulfilling prophecy. Even if you have to force it at first, tell your self it will go smoothly and easily. Don’t look back on past negative events and assume that it is the way a future even will end up. Stay in the now, for this present moment is all we have. Today is all there is. Assume good things will result.

Choose to be positive. I did. Life is so good, you just have to let yourself be able to realize it.

Tagged as: Positivity