Check out the book, “Mindful Recovery” and of course, Byron Katie.

Never underestimate your ability to change your life Karen.

First change (and challenge) your beliefs, then your life can change.

A few things – I’m glad you ordered “Undrunk” – I think that will help a lot with getting the hang of AA – and getting the most out of it.

As some people have noted, it’s going to be tough dealing with old friends and habits. I had to try to remove myself from certain situations in my early sobriety. When I couldn’t, I tried to have a plan – about what to say or do if I started to feel uncomfortable or tempted to drink. Having an exit strategy is key. You have to put your sobriety first, though, and not worry about what others will think. Eventually, it gets easier.

Having people to call – a whole slew of them – is a good idea, too. At my first AA meetings, after people learned I was a newcomer, many women handed me cards and slips of paper with their numbers on them. I only ended up calling a few of them, and never in dire moments, mostly just for a check-in or chat – but it helped. And I learned that they truly wanted to help – they wouldn’t have offered their numbers or answered if they didn’t mean it.

There’s a huge support network out there – you just have to access it. It’s there for you if and when you need it. Best of all, you will learn how to handle situations “that used to baffle” you. Not just regarding drinking, but regarding life in general — how to just BE in the world. I never knew how to do this – but now I have a plan, a program. And it works.

Keep going to meetings if you can, as often as you can. You might not always get a lot out of them, but I guarantee it’ll help. There will be one little tidbit you’ll take away that will undoubtedly make a difference.

As for other books to read, I found “Living Sober” helpful, if a bit dated, as far as giving practical ways to address everyday life and various social situations without alcohol.

I’d also delve into as many sober blogs as you can find. I have a few listed on my blog, and then each of those has a wealth of other sites listed, too. There’s a HUGE recovery blogging contingent, and everyone is very welcoming and supportive.

That’s all for now – I wish you courage and serenity and lots of love as you continue your journey. Hang in there – it gets easier, I promise.

–C.

Thank you for sharing your story. I am at a similar place in my life at the moment. And am inspired by your back story and fight ahead. How I happened upon your blog today was a random occurance, an outcome of my own search for thoughts and other’s experience in facing this difficult battle.

Please stay strong – for yourself, and for readers like me who draw strength from your story.

– Hook

Thanks a lot.

Ro

You never emailed me, but if you do, I might have other helpful ideas.

I just stumbled across your blog today. It sounds like we are going through very similar phases right now in our relationship with our addiction. I just recently also came to the conclusion that my drinking was starting to cause me big problems and that something had to change in a big way. While quitting ultimately may be what’s right for you, there are other options. Have you heard of naltrexone and the Sinclair method? Apparently people have had remarkable results with it helping them break their dependence and relearn how to drink like a normal person again. Here’s a link to an article about it on Wikipedia: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sinclair_Method. There has also been a book written about it by Dr. Roy Eskapa. I just put in for my first order of nal from an online pharmacy in India, and am hoping to get started over the holidays when the alcohol will be flowing freely.

I used to find it hard to socialise without a fair amount of drink, I’d just want to drink as fast as I could to shake off my inhibitions. I wonder if that is why some people get upset when you’re the one not drinking, if they have the need to drink maybe its unsettling when someone else isn’t.

I think we all have these hidden insecurities in one form or another…I think that’s part of being human and I for one am definitely not always happy. I think your sharing in such a honest way, has created space for others too Karen, I don’t think any of us have really got it sorted!

Jen x

Earlier this year, my coworker quit smoking. As of tomorrow, it will be 6 months.

In the early going, i was counting out her number of days in a row every morningas she walked into the office. I stopped at around 2 months.

If you think it’ll help, I’ll DM or @ you with your number of days everyday (except those days that I’m outta town ora way from my computer), and you can correct me — or not, that’s your dcecision– as to whether or not you kept the streak alive.

I guess that’s kinda what social internet tools help us do. Earlier this year, you put out your 7 day discipline plan. Your last paragraph was:

This might be more detail and personal information than the average reader needs, but I am using this public platform to commit to myself and all three of my subscribers that I will do this even when it doesn’t feel good. I’ll be posting follow up posts, depending how often I’m inspired this week.

You’re doing your end of that bargain of making yourself accoutnable. I want to do mine. And that’s KEEPING you accountable.

Japman